Formation of the helix

I've wrapped my loves around a single point in my life.  It seems I've decided that the work would reveal who I truly want to be.  Sometimes, an idea will catch my fancy and I'll try it and decide it is just NOT for me.  But lately, ideas converge in my mind to create one giant life tapestry.  Do I have a single passion?  Not really.  Maybe it's just being curious and seeing what I can do and what I can't do.  I am figuring out my own blocks by trying and it's making me happier.  I am still carrying the fires and dreaming of the stars.  I'm following.  I feel blind except for that lodestar bringing me home.  It is time to dream.  Dream bigger.  Take all of my experiences and let them feed off of each other.  Forging a path where they might grow.  In all honesty, I love the nettles along the road.  They keep me awake and focused and moving along.  I don't know what I'm doing exactly, but I'm creating a path to bumble along.  Something will come together.  Something will make sense.  And it does.  Survivalist mentality, work ethic, wild dreamer, compassionate stranger, world changer... in an unrequited way.  I'm not a screamer or a shouter.  I want to be a doer.  Learning to not list it, but do it.  Not think so much on it, but act on it.  That is how dreams become reality.  So, my reality is like a helix of things wrapping around each other.  Much like my Morning Glory vine twisting and choking over the fence.  Things are going wild out there.  Ideas are setting out on their own to be a wodewose in the forest.  Should I find him, we might merge.  One identity.  One decision.  Being Apollo and Dionysus in one.  Balance.  Yin and yang and all of that, too.  There's no real danger but it is still a tightrope walk.  Building confidence is the very reason one won't fall.  The work has brought us too far from where we started.  I can't see myself as I used to be.  I am excited for what I may become.  This is a boon of transformation.  This physical self must change to allow the spiritual self to evolve.  The harvest cornucopia overwhelmed with health and bounty.  A boon to my spirit.  A buoy, too.  The bane of my existence has always been self doubt.  Now, I see that transformation must occur.  It is painful.  Much like my Monarch friend.  Physical change, spiritual growth, mental shape, emotional depth.  If I can create a vessel that unhinges me from my tethers, what other adventures would be in store for me?  for us?